Get Back Up On That Horse

Last Tuesday I had a teacher job interview in Greenwich. There were 3 jobs available. The pay and benefits in Greenwich are good, and it is an appealing town to work in. But in all honesty, none of the positions were right for me. I spent a LOT of time and energy preparing. Putting portfolios together on the ipad, getting the right clothes, shoes, etc. The morning of the interview, the traffic was terrible, and I was slightly late. When I had the interview, I stumbled with my words, hesitated too much, and I felt it happening at the time.

Friday was the day I would have been notified if I had been chosen for round 2. No call. I was devastated. I know that it was "not meant to be"  and that there is something much better for me out there". It's so cliche but it's true! I went right from my sadness to the party for Martine, which was good to do but on Saturday morning I cried and cried. I am doing much better now, but it's been a challenge to let it go, these last few days.

My mind is in a creative place, I am thinking of other possibilities. What do I really want? I want to make artwork, and meditate. I want to share this experience of the joy of art making with others, kids and maybe adults too. This has been the best time, so healing, so self-affirming. So self-building. I am not sure that I want to teach small kids, but older kids, yes, and much more serious students. I want to be able to involve students with things outside of school, within the caring community, and within the art community. Maybe I don't want to be in a public school after all.